So this is me. To make a long story short, I am a 43 year old mom of 4 kids. My kids are mostly grown. My youngest is 17 and still in high school but the other 3 are all grown up. I am a full-time school counselor at an elementary school. I do have a boyfriend of 7 years, well almost 8 at this point.
At times, I feel like that about sums up who I am. Those few things about me seem to take up the majority of space in my life. However, I am working on figuring out who I am beside those few titles I hold. That is proving to not be a very easy thing to do. When people ask, "so tell me about yourself", that is literally the things I say. It feels weird to say anything else because those feel like the most important parts of me and therefore it feels as if none of the other parts of me really matter.
Now, I do know that of course those other parts matter but if I am honest (which I always intend to be) they don't seem to matter very much. My oldest son is 23 so I have held the title of mother for longer than I have not been a mom. I will say that is by far the most important title I hold but I often lose myself in that title. I am sure that I can not be alone in that. Surely, moms and dads alike often feel the same way. We put ourselves on the back burner for our children. That actually never stops, even though we believe once they become adults it will be different. It is slightly different but my children will always be my children and I still push my needs aside to ensure they have everything I could possibly give them.
My career is another important aspect of my life that often over shadows the others. I am fortunate enough to have a career that I love. I do not always like it but I always love it. I get to work to make a difference in the lives of students each and every day. There is almost no other joy quite like that joy especially when you see the difference that you made. When a little one chooses to walk away instead of lash out in anger. When a student studies hard and gets a good grade. When a student smiles and thanks me for being there for them and talking with them. I could go on and on about the ways that my life is fulfilled inside those four walls of that school building. But again that is only part of my life, it is not my whole life.
Then there is my relationship status. This seems to be one of the most important aspects of a person's life. Are you married? Seeing anyone? In a relationship? Living with someone? and so forth. I was married for 15 years. I will eventually share some of those stories. Currently as I stated, I have been in my current relationship for almost 8 years. Through the highs and lows, we are still going strong and I hope to continue moving forward with my boyfriend. He is the one I come home to, the one I tell my hopes, dreams, and desires to. The one I can't wait to talk about my day to. He is my person. But again, my relationship is only a part of me.
I believe that through this website, blog process, I am hoping to discover the other parts of me that I have been neglecting for years and years. I want to discover my hobbies and interests. I want to find out who I am outside of those 3 main things that seem define me the most.
As I write this, I am wondering if this is just a me thing or if you are thinking the same thing. Did I invest too much into those aspects of my life to the detriment of my whole self or is that just what most people do during certain stages in their life. What are the most important areas that you feel define you the most? When people ask you to tell them about who you are, what do you say? I am genuinely interested in your feelings on this subject matter and any advice or questions you can through my way.
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